“There is nothing as wonderful as loving someone, and nothing harder than losing them.”  

Foster Heath, Founder 

Heath Funeral Chapel held its annual Service of Remembrance on Sunday, November 18, at which time we remembered the recently deceased through music, a presentation of roses, and a discussion of ways to handle grief during a usually joyous time of year.  Especially during the holidays, we can come together and reaffirm that love never ends.

We would like to thank our special guests, Dr. Paul Suich of First Presbyterian Church and Beckie Haubry and Kristopher Ridgely of Harrison School for the Arts, for offering their support through their expertise and music, respectively.  We hope all who attended found something meaningful to take with them through this holiday season.

The following discussion questions (distributed at the service) may be helpful in caring for others and in tending to our own grief:

1. How have friends and family demonstrated that they really don’t understand what you’re going through?
2. How have friends and family demonstrated that they actually do understand what you’re going through?
3. One idea is scaling back the number of activities you engage in this holiday.  If you were to take that advice, what one activity would you immediately mark off your “to-do” list? How would refraining from that activity benefit you?
4. What word describes how you feel about the holidays? i.e. nervous, relaxed, fearful, tense, excited, etc.
5. Which holiday is the most painful for you to face: Thanksgiving, Christmas, or New Years? In one or two sentences, tell why.
6. Share one thing you enjoyed doing with your loved one during the holidays.
7. How have friends and family been a blessing to you over the holiday?
8. What new tradition might you create to help you through the holidays?
9. For those of you who have experienced holidays without a loved one, in one or two sentences, what advice would you give to those about to face it for the first time?
10. What are some of the bad clichés that are offered to grieving people?
11. What would encourage you to be honest about your sense of sadness, anger, anxiety, or sadness during the holidays?
12. How do you feel when a grieving person weeps during the holiday season?
13. One of the problems that grieving people often resort is that they feel rushed to get better.  Their friends often want them to lie about their grief, to say that they are getting better when it just simply hurts.  Describe your fear that allowing a grieving person to feel bad is just going to “make them go backwards.”
14. What are some practical ways that you can offer encouragement to a grieving person?
15. Based on my experience tonight, during this holiday season, I plan to. . .